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Taste the Rainbow May 1, 2016

taste-the-rainbow

My hall bathroom looks like someone tasted the rainbow and it didn’t agree with them.  Pink, blue, green, bleach and black stains have seeped into the marble and tile and long outlasted the hair for which the colors were originally intended. 

Both of my children, the boychild and the girlchild, have decided that the color of hair growing out of their heads, a color best described as “used coffee grounds” or maybe “topsoil,” a color which has served me well for the past 45 years, will not get them out of middle school with their popularity intact.

My daughter started in fourth grade, when I was declared the ONLY mother that did not allow her daughter to have a streak of pink in her hair.  I fought it for a short minute, eventually landing on, “it’s just hair, and the worst thing that happens is a pixie cut.”  And the beat went on, in multiple vibrant shades.  To paraphrase Crystal Gayle, “And Don’t It Make My White Grout Bluuuuuuuuuuuuuue.” 

My son, being your basic dude, didn’t color anything until recently, when he decided he’d try on ‘emo’ as a personality.  He dyed his hair jet black.  His sunny personality quickly faded the black, however, so he added blue, which only showed up when the sun shined on him directly.  Then he figured he’d bleach all that out and go, as he called it, “Draco Malfoy blonde.”  This resulted in a faded pinkish color he called, “raw chicken.”  He hid under a blanket for 18 hours until I got home with dye called, plainly, “brown.”  He then looked more or less exactly like he did $40 worth of drug store dye ago. 

My daughter recently spent her allowance on an intense green dye chosen mainly because of the cuteness of the boy modeling the color on the box.  She bleached her purple out to prep, and now has a mass of hot pink curls with white blonde patches, and the occasional natural brown spot sticking out defiantly.  Her hair is fried and dry and crinkles when you touch it. I think she looks like someone off-kilter by a mile: someone Helena Bonham Carter would portray in a movie.  She thinks she looks awesome.

Eventually my son decided he’d try again, only he saved his money and let a professional bleach it and then dye it Cookie Monster blue.  The blue is fun, and between that and his height, I can spot him instantly in any crowd.

How did I get from “over my dead body” to “please just dye it a consistent green?”  It’s a safe rebellion, I suppose, supported by straight A’s and nary a detention between them. 

Joke’s on them, though.  Thirty years from now, their kids will see these pictures.  I know.  I was their age in the 80s.

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Taste the Rainbow

2 Comments

  1. Tammy Osier

    Lori, funny you should mention the colors of the rainbow and hair…I am currently writing my mother’s Day contribution to Loganvillelocal, and looking back over my children’s childhood for embarrassing moments. I remember the time when my son, Jacob, 14, decided to mousse his hair into spikes, then take packages of Kool-aid and tip each spike with a different color. He was across the street doing this deed with his friend. I called up there for him to come home for dinner, and being a male child, ignored me. I called again. Same thing. the third and final time I had to threaten him, and home he came. And it rained. And rained. and poured. Did I mention he was “walking” home? By the time he got home, he looked like fruit striped gum! lolol My kids are in their thirties now and will soon see this stuff in living color (pardon the pun).

    Reply

    • Lori Duff

      That’s awesome! I hope you got pictures…………

      Reply

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Taste the Rainbow

2 Comments

  1. Tammy Osier

    Lori, funny you should mention the colors of the rainbow and hair…I am currently writing my mother’s Day contribution to Loganvillelocal, and looking back over my children’s childhood for embarrassing moments. I remember the time when my son, Jacob, 14, decided to mousse his hair into spikes, then take packages of Kool-aid and tip each spike with a different color. He was across the street doing this deed with his friend. I called up there for him to come home for dinner, and being a male child, ignored me. I called again. Same thing. the third and final time I had to threaten him, and home he came. And it rained. And rained. and poured. Did I mention he was “walking” home? By the time he got home, he looked like fruit striped gum! lolol My kids are in their thirties now and will soon see this stuff in living color (pardon the pun).

    Reply

    • Lori Duff

      That’s awesome! I hope you got pictures…………

      Reply

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Lori Duff

Lori B. Duff is an award-winning author who practices law on the side.  Her latest book, "If You Did What I Told You..." is set to be released in the Fall of 2019. You can follow her on Twitter at @LoriBDuff and on Facebook. For more blogs written by Lori, click here. For more information about Lori in general, click here. If you want Lori to do your writing for you, click here.

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