Lori Writes Funny Lori Duff Writes

Knowing What to Ask January 21, 2022

At the risk of sounding more get-off-my-lawn-y than usual, I want to lament the demise of research using books and paper. Don’t get me wrong – I appreciate the heck out of the internet.  Just yesterday I was working on a writing project that took place on a specific date.[1]  I started to write about…

read more →

New Year’s Resolution January 7, 2022

In case you hadn’t noticed, it is now 2022.  I saw on Twitter this morning that the release of Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” was closer to D-Day than it is to now, and that makes me feel decrepit.  It is the 51st time I have celebrated New Year’s Eve in some form or fashion, and, guessing…

read more →

Sparkle in the Mud December 24, 2021

Generally speaking, I’m not what you’d call fancy.  If you have the misfortune of seeing me on the weekend you might think to yourself, “I mean, is she going out of her way to look bad?  Did she look in her closet and find the sloppiest, most mismatched schmattas[1] she could locate and put them…

read more →

Hello Dark December 10, 2021

Hello dark, you’re not my friend. I can never remember which is daylight savings time – the fall back one or the spring forward one.  Honestly, I don’t care which is which, I just wish we’d quit falling and springing, I don’t like either, they both give me jet lag.  Whichever one makes high noon…

read more →

Targeted Marketing November 19, 2021

As a fifty-one year old woman, I don’t have a lot of use for penile enlargement supplements.  As a person who posts pictures of her dog more often than her kids, I don’t need horse tack or kitty litter.  As someone who has season tickets to the opera, it’s a good bet that I might…

read more →

Topics to Talk About November 6, 2021

My son turned twenty not too long ago, and my daughter is on the verge of eighteen.  I talk about this an annoying amount because it means that in a matter of weeks I can count on my fingers, I won’t have (legal) children anymore.  Oh, don’t get me wrong.  There are bigger problems to…

read more →

Full-Grown Adult October 22, 2021

My son is about to turn 20 and I have some feelings about that.  When other people turn 20, I think, well yeah, he’s an adult, of course he’s 20.  But when Jacob turns 20, I still see the little boy who called blueberries “boobabies” and who peered into a clogged up toilet and diagnosed…

read more →

War Stories October 10, 2021

Let me start out by saying that I do love my husband.  We’ve been married for 22 years now, and I’m hoping for at least 22 more. But. He’s retired, I’m not.  He’s been retired for some time.  I’ve been going to work every day for some time.  He’s got the time to watch YouTube…

read more →

Toxic Positivity September 24, 2021

You know someone like the person I’m about to talk about.  It doesn’t matter what awful thing has just happened, they always have this giant smile on their face and a super cheery attitude.  Car wreck fifteen minutes after mailing off the last payment?  Oh yay!  I get a new car!  Someone died?  Lucky them,…

read more →

Crapola September 11, 2021

If you’re in the market for crapola, you need look no further than my house.  My house is the repository of crapola of all kinds.  We are a department store of crapola.  Housewares?  Look over there.  Women’s lingerie?  Right in that corner.  Tools?  Check out our selection in the garage.  You don’t even want to…

read more →