Note: This piece won 3rd place in the spring 2017 Fan Story non-fiction essay writing contest. One of the most interesting things about being a parent is how often you find yourself saying things that you never thought you’d say. There are plenty of sentences that have flown out of my mouth using common words with…
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Before You Were Mine Disclaimer: I was given a copy of “Before You Were Mine” by Em Muslin by the good folks at Books and the Bear in exchange for an honest review. “Before You Were Mine” tells the story of Eli Bell. Eli gets pregnant at 14, and her baby daughter is taken away…
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“Get a Job, Kid!” I can’t count the number of times I’ve said this in response to a sentence that starts “Mooooomm! I waaaaant.” Well, my boy finally took my advice. My boy, who is now so old that if he goes a few days without shaving you can see the stubble on his jawline…
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Note: On January 14, 2017, my daughter became a Bat Mitzvah. It is traditional for the mother (me) to give a speech going on and on about how awesome her child is. There were so many ways that my daughter was awesome, I didn’t know how to list them all without being boring. Then it…
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Back before the laws of physics were passed and no one wore seat belts because we all believed it would be safer to be ‘flung free,’ my parents owned a big blue Chevy Caprice Station Wagon. My sister and I would fight over who got to sit in the ‘way back’ amongst the groceries and…
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My mild obsession with Wonder Woman is no secret. I drink from a Wonder Woman mug in my office. I have a Wonder Woman watch. I have a Wonder Woman cuff bracelet that may or may not actually deflect bullets. So when I was killing time by wandering around the local Wal-Mart while my daughter…
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My son turned 15 a week ago, and that means in this neck of the woods that he got his Learner’s Permit. That’s right. My bitty baby, born two and a half weeks early, smaller by every measurement than my housecat, is now legally allowed to have primary control of a one ton projectile moving…
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Hello. My name is Lori, and I’m a Yesoholic. I have a more or less clinical resistance to saying no to whatever people ask of me. In fact, even when I say no, people take it as a yes. For example, when I was nominated as the secretary of the middle school band boosters my…
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If I were a little kid, and I presented you with this picture I had drawn with crayons:you would have no real way of knowing if it was supposed to be a boy or a girl. It’s kind of a generic person face. Nothing especially feminine or masculine about it. However, if I were to…
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Someone Could Get Hurt: A Memoir of Twenty-First-Century Parenthood “Someone Could Get Hurt” by Drew Magary is a hilarious parenting memoir that is relatable and heartbreaking at the same time. I bought this book because I read Magary’s Hater’s Guide to the Williams-Sonoma Catalog, an annual snark-fest making fun of the Christmas catalog that, while…
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